“I’m an ugly-ass motherf**ker,” the 24-year-old told the publication. “[Face tattoos] maybe come from a place of insecurity, to where I don’t like how I look, so I’m going to put something cool on there so I can look at myself and say, ‘You look cool kid,’ and have a modicum of self-confidence.”
Malone might have ink tattooed all over his body, but it’s the ones on his face that have garnered the most attention. He recently debuted a bloody buzzsaw and gauntlet to a various collection that includes a knife by his right ear, the phrase “stay away” displayed across his forehead, and the words “tired” and “always” scripted across both cheeks.
The “Congratulations” singer also opened up about his life-long mental health struggles throughout the interview, stating that keeping his life in check is a constant work in progress. “Middle school, I would cry myself to sleep every f**kin’ day. High school, the same thing. I tried to drink some beers to get rid of that s**t, but it just never goes away. I don’t think that’s anybody’s fault. It has to do with something pre-disposed in you.”
Malone also revealed that he finds himself worrying whether taking medication for his health will make or break his creativity, as many of his rap music contemporaries (Mac Miller, Lil Peep, and most recently, Juice WRLD) have died from overdoses and he’s aware that he could be part of the unfortunate group.
Instead of relying on medication, the rapper seems to use music as his outlet for maintaining stability. “I’m trying,” he said. “It’s difficult. Through my songs, I can talk about whatever I want. But sitting here, face-to-face, it’s difficult.”
This article originally appeared on Men’s Health