Encourage her mind to wander: fantasising during sex may help her orgasm, finds a recent Belgian study published in Sexual and Relationship Therapy.
Women who reported regularly experiencing the big O were more likely to imagine sexy scenarios while getting it on than those who had trouble finishing.
It’s possible that her erotic thoughts help keep her focused on feeling good, the researchers say. Women who have a hard time achieving climax tend to be more distracted during sex, according to the paper, while those who orgasm easily may be more tuned into their sensations.
So encourage her to fantasise, says study author Dr Francoise Adam. Many women feel guilty about it, so make sure she knows you’re glad she has an active mind, Adam says.
Even better yet, you can help engage her in the moment and take a starring role in her script by ramping up your dirty talk, says Dr Gloria Brame, a sex therapist and the author of Come Hither: A Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex. Start by whispering how much you love to make her feel good. From there, grunts, moans or any sort of verbal reaction can help her achieve orgasm, Brame says.